I want to more arguments ..Bonsai Humor Thread No. 2

Pretty accurate. A man in our club has gone to 3 of the (I believe) weeklong workshops at Mirai. He is HOOKED. He bought a 1 foot length of evidently special bamboo to make chopsticks for $30.00. Last time, he came back with a mame ficus for $750. A MAME for $750!!!
Most decent mame ficus bonsai can be made in 2-6 months. I would not pay that much for one.
 
1 - You can achieve equal amounts of quality in a wired, tree using aluminum as you can with copper. The whole, “only use copper on conifers and aluminum on deciduous” just comes off as rich person, parroting, and ultra rule following nonsense.

2 - Bonsai shows = Westminster dog shows
If you want bonsai to be treated as art than start showing it as an art and not treating like a pie baking contest at the state fair.

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2 - Bonsai shows = Westminster dog shows
If you want bonsai to be treated as art than start showing it as an art and not treating like a pie baking contest at the state fair.
Hey man, we get a lot of new club members from the three rotations of bonsai shows we put on at the Wisconsin State Fair.
 
Most decent mame ficus bonsai can be made in 2-6 months. I would not pay that much for one.
Show us one developed in 2 months that is “decent”, even six months. I think what you have in mind and the $750 mame may be in different ballparks. These are probably older than six months

 
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I hate Junipers. 🥊🥊
Cmon, come at me!
Nah, I respect you for having and voicing your opinion. I agree that you hate junipers. I don't hate them though.


2 - Bonsai shows = Westminster dog shows
If you want bonsai to be treated as art than start showing it as an art and not treating like a pie baking contest at the state fair.
What is the alternative? Like a car show with loud music and guys pulling branches and yanking trees out of pots to show the roots? Displayed in a museum with a note next to it and hundreds of tourists in front of them?
Either way man, I can see improvements too.


Anyway, one more opinion to voice here, and I will do it in caps because people need to SEE this:
REVIEWING BONSAI TREES ON A NON VISUAL PLATFORM LIKE A PODCAST IS THE STUPIDEST THING EVER. YOU ARE REVIEWING A VISUAL ART, AN IMAGE, ON A PLATFORM THAT HAS NO VISUAL AIDS. STOP DOING THAT, NOBODY BENEFITS EXCEPT THE OWNER, SEND IT TO THEM PERSONALLY. IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE PUBLIC AS THE PUBLIC HAS NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT BECAUSE YOUR DESCRIPTIVE CAPABILITIES SUCK.

Thank you, have a nice day.
 
Show us one developed in 2 months that is “decent”, even six months. I think what you have in mind and the $750 mame may be in different ballparks. These are probably older than six months

I guess I'm just not that impressed by mame ficus that I would be spending that much on one. These both look like shohin. I play with willow leaf ficus mid summer for fun and I live in Wisconsin so I'm not going to drop money on tropicals.
 
I scroll reddit r/bonsai each day until I see succulents and then stop. I generally make it about three to six posts.
Succulents are house plants. House plants are not bonsai. Succulents are not bonsai. Whoever keeps acting like they are should finish their beer and meet me outside.. See any succulents there? THATS WHAT I MEAN.
If a bonsai dies, it should turn to wood. If it turns to mush instead, you've been growing a solid smoothy. Good luck with trying to make a tanuki out of that!
There are many thousands of types of succulents. Heck, the euphorbia genus alone has 2000 species. Some of them are just as woody as anything you grow. All of them grow outside. Where did you think they came from, Ikea?
 
I have a young tree... that is straight as a post. It's already literari/bunjin. 🧐


The Virginia creeper was the closest thing I actually had. Lost it when I had covid. I think my husband may have over loved it. As it was his favorite of my collection.
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These always sneak past the fence from our neighbor's yard, and I never knew what to do with them. Time to put a couple in pots!
 
Hey man, we get a lot of new club members from the three rotations of bonsai shows we put on at the Wisconsin State Fair.
I didn’t say they shouldn’t happen! I’m all for spreading the word, but these types of shows are not art shows. IMO
 
Nah, I respect you for having and voicing your opinion. I agree that you hate junipers. I don't hate them though.



What is the alternative? Like a car show with loud music and guys pulling branches and yanking trees out of pots to show the roots? Displayed in a museum with a note next to it and hundreds of tourists in front of them?
Either way man, I can see improvements too.


Anyway, one more opinion to voice here, and I will do it in caps because people need to SEE this:
REVIEWING BONSAI TREES ON A NON VISUAL PLATFORM LIKE A PODCAST IS THE STUPIDEST THING EVER. YOU ARE REVIEWING A VISUAL ART, AN IMAGE, ON A PLATFORM THAT HAS NO VISUAL AIDS. STOP DOING THAT, NOBODY BENEFITS EXCEPT THE OWNER, SEND IT TO THEM PERSONALLY. IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE PUBLIC AS THE PUBLIC HAS NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT BECAUSE YOUR DESCRIPTIVE CAPABILITIES SUCK.

Thank you, have a nice day.
What is the alternative to you? I’ve got quite a few ideas personally, but that’s the point. Expression through the form outside of a typical “bonsai show” is crucial for it to be considered art. If that’s what people desire at least. 🤷🏼‍♂️
 
Bonsai rules. Hate 'em. I practice very few of them. Those that I do, happen as an accidental result of me styling a tree in a way that pleases me. NONE of my trees have "first branch, opposite side branch, back branch" type of styling. It's fine if you do it and, if it looks good, I have no problem with it. In my opinion, a true art should never follow a pattern.

Excuse me while I make popcorn. :p
 
Some people in bonsai are way too arrogant . Even the younger guys my age , there seems to still be arrogance and a false sense of superiority. Some people on here don’t even recognize or respect a persons apprenticeship and progression just because it’s not with someone popular on social media or they didn’t go to Japan for 4 years .. there I said it . I can name plenty of people in bonsai that have not gotten formal apprenticeship in Japan. But to think that someone has a tremendous opportunity to not have to relocate and quit their career is somewhat lesser in their eyes / teachers eyes because they can only apprentice Fridays and weekend disgusts me . I know who you are
I agree completely, albeit there's more one with more to learn than me. I'm never going to be an apprentice. If anyone questions or criticizes what I'm doing now, I'll be obligated to agree. I'm learning now, and I'm willing to listen and heed advice from those who have more experience. I'll likely never have a reasonable opportunity for an in-person bonsai course due to my isolated location. But that doesn't affect my ability to learn. It only affects what information I have access to. One day, I hope to have trees that can stand up against these criticisms, and I'll be especially satisfied with my work and can then choose to listen or disregard advice.
It's like PhDs who consider themselves superior because of fancy letters before and/or after their name. Obviously they are intelligent and loaded to the gills with knowledge. I have respect for anyone who puts in that kind of work! But to be told that I'm lesser, that I don't reach their level of intellect, to me, shows a kind of unearned entitlement.
 
This is by a friend of mine, in a local museum that every once in a while has bonsai exhibited
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This needs to be more common. I don't have anything worth showing right now, and I know most people will never get into bonsai, but I can't imagine too many people wouldn't appreciate it.
 
What is the alternative to you? I’ve got quite a few ideas personally, but that’s the point. Expression through the form outside of a typical “bonsai show” is crucial for it to be considered art. If that’s what people desire at least. 🤷🏼‍♂️
Assign a spot within a bright lit room to an artist and let them do their own display instead of the rows of tables seems like a good start to me.
But the car show idea with hot models in very few clothes, opened pots, barbecue and a couple of guys in the back revving branches and blasting metal music sounds like a fun idea.
I'm also in favor of someone standing up and doing bansky style bonsai in random city locations.
 
There are many thousands of types of succulents. Heck, the euphorbia genus alone has 2000 species. Some of them are just as woody as anything you grow. All of them grow outside. Where did you think they came from, Ikea?
Yes. They look like they were die cut and premade to assemble at home. Look man, with any other plant type I wouldn't say these kind of things but succulents are the most Ikea looking plants in the plant world.
 
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