Discernment I reckon the better word for what I'm describing. You see Coach...I'm not judge mental of others trees...just my own. Because we are all on the ladder learning. Some further than others...we all start at the bottom and I would hope that with time as in all things...we fine tune ourselves and grow. Anyone who knows me...knows I am not
,nor do I ever try to put myself above another. It's not in me...and no amount of time with bonsai will change my inner me of who I am. But, I do challenge myself...to have material I can be proud of sitting on my table. Since I plan for a smaller size collection...I challenge myself to make sure each in their own right have character to draw me in and stand out amongst the other trees I own.
I'm 44 years young....and I as well have no desire to show my trees at this time. I am a good two hours from any group/club. So my learning comes from online sources and books. I have come to respect the knowledge of a few who I will go to directly to ask a specific question. My desire is to have a very small collection of trees...I always said between 20-25 trees as well. I'm not so much focused on having a ton of species. But ones that speak to me. With that last drought...I have thought to even shorten that number with the time that I exhaust in keeping my own landscape happy.
But to say I never made a bad choice in material...would be a lie. At the time...I was thrilled with the purchase. But, I've grown...and can see faults. Again, I have some nice landscape material out of the deal. And it's lessons learned so no real mistake if something was gleaned from it. So not a bad thing. The only person I judge is myself...to become better at discerning better quality bones in a tree. And good bones don't necessarily break the bank...if your willing to put some years into development of the apex and canopy. Bones rarely change...but can and have by mishaps can happen.
Example...I paid $82 for this shimpaku tree which included shipping. (Not bad I felt since I have always been drawn to mame twisted trunk trees.) I feel the bones were worth the price. I am willing to invest in growing it out and developing it further.
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Now, my oops purchase. Night and day difference between the two materials... The bougainvillea as seen in the tree below. Holds a special meaning for me. It's a tree I first seen while on a missionary trip to a village we now are considered full time/part time missionaries through WGM. So at that time...any and ALL bougainvillea I found no flaws in. Because my emotions got the best of me. This is the tree now in my fairy garden...I had many concerned with those mess of roots tangled at the base of the tree. Sure now, one could chop it and attempt to grow new nebari. (Bougainvillea are known to root well) But, you see I had a mishap over last winter...losing all my bougainvillea cuttings. From a propane tank mishap when arctic temps rolled through. So I'm gun shy to attempt to do this. So it's going to be in my fairy garden where I can enjoy it for the bougainvillea it is...without being judge mental of the roots as the huge flaw they are. Because the stuff in the pot camouflage the hot mess. It also is a reminder of who I was...and how far I came so I honestly don't mind it. I still am drawn to the bougainvillea...but, I have reigned in my emotions to try and see the tree for its potential.
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My trees are far from finished...or grand. But, to me each has a bit of character. The bones of the tree is the character that sits on my bench so to speak. Refinement along with the journey keeps them there. This post was to also be for those on their earlier stages of bonsai...to see that when they grow into refinement...that they see that nothing was a mistake. Just a learning curve so to speak. When something is learned...there is no real mistake in that. That is my stand...and if ones can see that. They will find even in disappointment...they gleaned something valuable. (With say the loss of a tree. If one learns why it died...it was a lesson learned. So not a total waist...when knowledge is gained)
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