BEHOLD!!! THE MYSTERY OF BONSAI CARE SOLVED... (you are welcome)

[tmjudd1]

They didnt have “chop it to the lowest branch”

No, no, no! Don't chop it to the lowest branch! "There's no way it would look as good as the picture if you did that!"

 

[tmjudd1]

My pamphlet is much better. It shows a real photo of the sun, a real picture of a watering can, and actual photographs of a fertilizer bag and a pair of shears, however. I can't just hand those out for free, but for 'you', my friends, ... I'm willing to share my secrets for the ridiculously low price of only $9.95 plus shipping and handling... "BUT WAIT"... If you order now, I'll toss in an extra pamphlet, free of charge, just pay an additional fee for shipping!

 

[penumbra]

Sun + water + fertilizer + care = bonsai

We are missing soil and art

(Sun + water + fertilizer + soil) * (care + art) = bonsai

Care = species * (maintenance + growth)

Art = (vision * styling) + pot

Pot = (shape + color + texture) * scale

Or the more theoretical

Bonsai = Nature * (1/skill level of stylist) - (1/experience level of viewer) therefore...

Bonsai = Nature/skill level of stylist - (1/experience level of viewer)

Unsolveable when skill level of stylist or experience level of viewer = 0

Way too complicated.